Roastmaster vs. iRANiAN.CYBER.ARMY Part Deux

Well, about a week ago I posted here in regards to this “hacking” that took place on Twitter supposedly carried out by the “iRANiAN.CYBER.ARMY”, a group I assume is comprised entirely of Iranian 11-year-olds who are unable to get their pilots licenses yet so rather than waste time playing with trash and AK-47’s they took the liberty of jazzing up Twitter late 90’s style.

I wanted to be all over this like some kind of a racist joke about rice or Ethiopians so I sent an email out to this “army” posing as a Norwegian news reporter. My email, as you can probably still see on the front page of, was mostly a stab at them thinly veiled as an interview. Honestly in hind sight that was probably a stupid move and they might have bombed my house but then again these people were dumb enough to use Gmail and that’s unfortunately the nail in the casket here; I emailed them and the next day when I checked my inbox I had that ominous message from the MAILER DAEMON informing me that my message delivery was “permanently failed forever” or something equally as insulting and demeaning. Thanks Google, thanks for telling me that I EPIC PHAIL’D LOLZ on sending terrorists an email.

I’ve attempted to look into this “news” further since it happened so I’d have at least something of merit to say but honestly trying to search for anything just brings up an equal portion of idiot bloggers echoing the sentiment “OH NOEZ TEH TWITTAR WAS HAXORD ;______;” and politically-skewed news websites trying to groundlessly tie this into some kind of Anti-American attack ON AMERICAAAAAAATERRORISMMMBLARGH. After wading through all of this nonsense online I have come to this conclusion: Twitter fucking deserved it, and they deserve to have it happen again. Just look at how stupid the people who take it as SRS BIZNZ are acting about it. Seriously. Twitter barely passes as “social media”, it’s more like text message trash that you’d never want to read and had the pool of Tweets not been tainted by middle-schoolers talking about how they want to bang the cast of Avatar or whatever maybe¬†Twitter would have sufficed as a kind of syndication if RSS hadn’t been developed some five fucking billion years ago.

Where’s the job application for that CYBER ARMY OF IRAN because I’d like to be in on their next op.

– Roastmaster